A 'Legend' 25 Years in the Making

As you can probably tell by now, this has pretty much shifted from a random thought blog to a memory blog. I'll get back to the randomness soon enough, but I have a little more nostalgia to get out, so bear with me.

Ask any male in between the ages of 25 and 35 what they remember about their childhood. You'll most likely get the expected responses such as playing tee ball or pee wee football, first days of school and going through grade school, going on vacations with family, or remembering the arrival of a little brother or sister. However I can almost guarantee that they will have another memory: Nintendo.

In October of 1985 the Nintendo Entertainment System was released in North America, along with 18 launch titles. After the video game crash of 1983, people were hesitant to purchase video games again, so Nintendo decided to call their little grey box an 'Entertainment System.' The system came with a pack-in game that would change the face of both the entertainment industry and a generation of kids: Super Mario Brothers. Tight gameplay, colorful worlds and a memorable score made both the game and the system a hit. Shortly after that, Nintendo and Mario were everywhere...cereals, TV shows, curtains (which I had), you name it and Nintendo was on it. It even made it's way into a quick scene in Ghostbusters II. Nintendo ruled the freaking world.

My 9-year old mind: BLOWN

My mother's friend Terri had one, and whenever I went over to her house I played it when I could and had a blast. Then, one birthday I opened the big box present from my parents and staring back at me was my very own NES. I played Mario and Duck Hunt for weeks on end, sharing Mario secrets with friends and trying to beat the game. (Oddly enough a feat I did not accomplish on the first Mario game until many years later)

Cut to Christmas, the season when little kids' dreams are filled with wonder and anticipation. What can really live up to that? I had no idea what to expect. I awoke Christmas morning and was pleasantly surprised with the games 'Kung Fu' and 'Mach Rider.' A karate and a motorcycle game? That's 'Kid Nirvana,' and I was riding high. I honestly thought I was going to die when I opened my Ghostbusters soundtrack tape....for me it could get no better. And I was wrong.

The last present I noticed was one more NES game that I hadn't heard very much of, but instead of the standard gray cartridges that NES games came in, this one was gold. It was 'The Legend of Zelda.'

Who gives a crap if it's good or not, it's freaking GOLD!

A whole new world lie before me, with no specific place to go and the ability to roam free through the land, this was the game for kids with imagination. You could lose yourself imaging what the creatures looked like and trying to figure out the puzzles to reach the underground labyrinths. My best friend Shaune and I double teamed the game, one of us would play through and the other would be the "map master" and would navigate and help with strategy to help the other make it out alive. Unlike Mario games, what made this one so unique was that it had a battery backup built in to the cartridge to save your progress (the first of it's kind), because the game was so big it couldn't be finished in a single setting.

After you fought your way through the 8 dungeons and collected the treasures within, slew the boss and collected the fragment of the Triforce, you made your way up Death Mountain. Epic stuff. You would then enter Level-9, which might have well been a game of it's own. It was HUGE! After you found the red ring and silver arrows, you would finally make your way to face Ganon, a pig-like monster who became invisible and shot fireballs at you. If you managed to hit him with your sword 5 times, he would turn red. Nail him with the silver arrow and poof! All that was left was the Triforce in a pile of dust. In the next room was Princess Zelda. The game was over and the credits rolled. But wait....what's this? "Another Quest Will Start From Here....Press Start." Hm. Okay, it looks the same....but it's not. Levels are moved, enemies are tougher. It's another game in one!

At this point kids everywhere were floored. Probably the only thing that floored us more (video-game wise) at this time was the discovery in the game 'Metroid' that the bad-ass gun toting, missile shooting alien killer was in fact, a woman. After that there was Zelda 2, which was completely different. It was a side scroller with RPG elements such as magic and leveling up. Many people were not a fan, and Shaune and I were no different. We played it because it was Zelda, but only in later years did I come to appreciate it more.

In 1991 Nintendo released the Super Nintendo Entertainment System, packing 16-bits of awesomeness that would melt gamers faces that were used to the 8-bit powered NES. We had no idea what the hell a bit was, but we did know that 16 was twice as much as 8, so it had to be twice as good. The next year we found out just how good it was when "A Link To The Past" came out. It returned to the top-down perspective that made the first one so accessible, and the expanded on every thing. The graphics were top notch, NPCs (non-playable characters) had a greater role, your inventory tripled with all kinds of cool stuff to use, and probably most importantly there was a back-story. Shaune and I played this game like it was our jobs (in between school and little league), and when we beat it we were the bad boys on the block!

Remember the first time seeing the rain? Freaking sweet.

After that the series got a portable game, which I'm playing now, however it did not get another console release until November of 1998. That being my junior year of high school I was too busy driving, working and trying to pass classes that my video game playing took a back seat, and I missed out what many consider to be the greatest game of all time: "Ocarina of Time." However, my brother who was 10 at the time had the game and carried on the Zelda tradition, something we still share today.

Over the years many new Zelda games have come and gone, and I've played and beat most of them. While they're all great games in their own regard, they can't really top those first games for me. They may be dated graphically and the technology held the storytelling ability back, but the gameplay was all you needed. I like to look at those games and remember the sense of wonder that came with them, from the opening of the golden cartridge to stretching my brain trying to figure out the puzzles and where to go. It encouraged gamers to talk and share their secrets, and through that bonded friendships. The series turned 25 years old this year and every new title is just as anticipated as it was in the late 80's and 90's. That's legendary.

Side note: I've been doing this for a month now and have really been enjoying it. Are you? I would love to hear (or read) your feedback!

Hanging by a Moment While the World Held Its Breath

For most Americans, 2001 will always be remembered as what happened on September 11^th. While that’s true for me as well, the fall of 2001 was an incredible time for me that I revisit in my memory time and time again due to an album. Freshman year was fantastic. I was involved in some great organizations and met some really great friends. Headed into sophomore year was gearing up to be quite fantastic. I was the head of the film committee for ACE (Association for Campus Entertainment), was the praise and worship leader for Intervarsity Christian Fellowship (IV), and had an on-campus apartment with my roommate from the year before and two other guys. It was going to be a great year.

The summer before was great, I spent the summer working the early shift at Target. Working in the back room pulling inventory wasn’t exactly what I wanted to come back to, but it was work. My brother and I would stay up late watching Conan, and then playing Playstation/N64 games until the reruns of older Conan episodes came up in the wee hours of the morning. Those were fantastic times. His friend Steven also let us borrow a few of his CDs to listen to and/or copy. One of those just happened to be “No Name Face” by Lifehouse. I listened to that album a few times over that summer (along with Weezer’s Green Album….still my pick as their best), and thought it was pretty decent, particularly "Hanging by a Moment". Eventually I would identify the entire fall semester with that album.

I was able to move in early due to working with ACE, so having an apartment on campus to myself for almost a week before 90% of the rest of the students moved in was awesome. When people moved in and started joining ACE and IV, there was hardly a time that I would walk around campus without seeing someone I knew. It was a good time, although it wasn’t without its hitches. I broke up with my girlfriend most unfairly. She was very timid and at the time I was not. We would never fight, but when we went places, it didn’t seem as if we were together. It’s probably the most jerk thing I’ve ever done, and I probably should have handled it better. I remember listening to a song from the album called “Simon,” where he talks about self-worth and how you should hold your head high. I didn’t feel like holding my head high, but I knew I had to. A few weeks later I met a girl whom two years from then I would end up dating for just around 4 years…but that’s another story. Like I said, it was a crazy time as well!

Classes began in full swing and I met some really great guys in my computer science classes. I met Mike, who I found out was from Wilson, which is 15 minutes away from Rocky Mount, so we became friends pretty quickly, and remain friends to this day…and every time I talk to him he still asks me when I’m moving back. We had our new student outreach for IV and I met Allen. We both shared a love for music and while I was able to play guitar, Allen could only write lyrics and hum what he wanted the melody to be. We sat down one evening in his suite room and I threw some chords together to a song of his called “Wheel of the Potter.” I had no real clue what I wanted it to sound like, and neither did he, but I took one of the Lifehouse songs called “Somewhere In Between” and rearranged the chords and put his words to it. With the “Lifehouse Remix Song” put down we reached out to our bass player for IV; a younger guy named Ian who was completely on board. We got together at Ian’s house (he was a Wilmington native and lived at home) in his garage, and our band “Better Luck Next Time” was born. We wrote a few other songs that fall, and Allen and I still play them today when we get the chance.

One Tuesday morning Sarah (my girlfriend at the time) called me at 8 in the morning, which was strange since my Tuesday classes were not until after lunch. She told me that a plane had hit the World Trade Center and that they were covering it on the news. I thought that was odd, and since I was already awake I might as well get up and check it out. I got out of the shower and got dressed just in time to see the second plane hit the WTC. It was unbelievable to say the least. I woke my roommate Dan up and we sat and watched in horror as the events unfolded. I left to go get something to eat and walking to the Hawk’s Nest all I saw were people on phones and crying. The university union had closed circuit TVs all over the place broadcasting campus news. On that day they were all on CNN and every TV had no fewer than two dozen students crowded around them. It seemed as if the whole world had stopped. We were confused, sad, angry, and lost. As anyone can tell you, things were never the same after that.

After that, we tried to return to normal. Midnight Madness came and ACE put on a heck of a show. We had American Gladiators style jousting, Surf 107.5 was giving away CDs and swag, we had t-shirts and contests, it was a lot of fun. 

Shortly thereafter, the air became cool. UNCW is a fantastic place in the spring, summer, and fall; but for me I always liked it in the winter. While not overly cold, there was always a chill that kept most people inside. The campus looked even more spread out with fewer people around, and it just seemed more serene. I always found it quite peaceful, and when I go back in the winters, it’s a lot of fun to walk around a semi-deserted campus. I know, I’m weird….I’m okay with it. I have great memories of walking to class in my pea coat (I loved that coat!) and my headphones on, listening to No Name Face. Every time I hear “Breathing” from that album (a song that I still think is one of the most beautiful songs ever written) I can see the leafless trees and people bundled up while headed to and from class.

Right around Christmas I was approached by Shannon from Campus Services about an outdoor Christmas program they were having. They would have music and theater skits, all on the amphitheater in the commons for students and public to attend. She asked if the IV praise band would be interested in performing, and after a brief discussion we agreed. I learned and coordinated up to play “God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen” as done by the Barenaked Ladies and Sarah McLaughlin, and it was met with an incredible reception.

I’ve always been able to make a connection to music in my memory. Whenever I hear a song it sticks with me and I associate it with a time. I guess that’s why whenever I listen to songs from “No Name Face,” I’m sent back to that year…and sent back to the feelings and emotions I had around that time. I remember sitting on my bed with books strewn out in front of me, with the blinds open so I could see where the apartment next to me had their Christmas lights on the patio glowing brightly against the darkness. All the while I had the album playing softly in the background while I studied. My wall was covered in the fliers advertising the movies that we showed on campus, my new pea coat hanging on the back of the door, lightly brushing up against my guitar that was always within an arm’s reach. The soft glow of the computer monitor while it played “Cling and Clatter” and “Quasimodo” before settling into the quiet ballad “Everything” illuminated the room with that extra little bit of light and lift that I needed to press on through the nights of studying.

With all the craziness of college; trying to find my place and make my mark, figuring out relationships, and understanding who I was and who I wanted to be, music was a common theme for me. Many times it felt like the song “Sick Cycle Carousel” where he says: “when will this end, it goes on and on. Over and over and over again. Keep spinning around, I know that it won’t stop until I step down from this for good.”

Whenever that album comes over my iPod I can close my eyes and remember what it was like at the time, and every time I do I want to go back there...more than anything.  

Fear and Loathing of Yourself

So my original Tuesday/Thursday planned update schedule took a bit of a nose dive. I wanted to hold off on posting until after the baseball trip with my dad and some friends, and then stuff went awry. A quick heads up, this post will be quite candid; so if you don't want to read about medical stuff, stop now and check in later.

Google is evil. I'll get to that in a minute. For those that don't know me, I am 29 years old and have been losing my hair for the past few years. Being quite single I see this as a big drawback for my social/dating life (nevermind the ridiculous shyness or being slightly overweight, but that's for another post). Having tried Rogaine and finding moderate success, I went to a dermatologist after Propecia - a drug that has been proven to help men regrow hair. I began taking it (or a generic version of it called Finasteride, which is the name of the drug) about a year and a few months ago. To others my hair seemed to be thicker and fuller, though I never noticed. I guess it's because I see it every day and didn't really notice it.

Well one thing I should have done prior to taking this is to fully research the side effects. Two weeks ago I noticed that I was having some pain that is male oriented. Any guy that has been hit with a ball or bumped into a corner with their lower mid-section can relate. I attributed it to an odd moment at work when I tried to sit in my chair and it rolled out from under me and I sat down awkwardly. I didn't think much about it until the pain stayed around for a few days. I remember reading that Finasteride can cause some side effects in that general area and decided to stop taking it for a while. Then I went online....

If you're ever sick or have an odd ailment, stay off of Google. After two days of research I was convinced that I had everything under the sun, 99% of which was not even possible. Everything I read spun me deeper and deeper into a pit of anxiety and fear. On top of that, Finasteride has many side effects that don't take effect until you stop taking the medication. So as new side effects appeared I looked up those symptoms and was convinced that I had anything from simple side effects to diseases or infections that require you to get them from other people or dirty needles. (Again, not possible, and for those of you keeping score at home, that's about the 35th stupid thing I've said in this post already....but that's how my brain works. I'm a worst-case-scenario person) It was affecting my sleep, my eating, and my social habits. I finally decided to call my doctor Wednesday of last week and ask if this was normal. Since I had stopped taking the medication and the pain was subsiding, they said that's what it was and I had no reason to worry. Well telling me not to worry about something is about as useful as trying to move a concrete building by standing in front of it and breathing on it.

No matter how much I talked myself down, my worst-case-scenario brain kept convincing myself that something was really wrong. I reverted to my eight year old self and decided that I needed to go home thinking that getting out of town would do me some good, but mostly because I was scared. My family is outstanding and they were more supportive than anyone could ever ask for. After a nice relaxing weekend (it had to be, fatigue is a big side effect), I came back and called my doctor on Monday. They agreed to see me and after an agonizing hour waiting for him to show up, it was time. After having a discussion with my doctor that I will not share here (HIPPA laws and all....haha), he confirmed what I should have believed a long time ago. I'm fine. Everything that's happening is normal, and I have nothing to worry about. In a few weeks I should be back to normal. Hopefully by then I'll be able to put all of this insanity behind me, and have it fade into a distant, laughable memory.

While I'm still recovering from getting off of the medication, I'm sloooowly starting to get better. I still have waves of anxiety, but I'm getting better. To my friends who have been with me while going through this; thank you. I can't handle all the crazy myself and I appreciate you helping me manage it. To those who are reading this that don't know me at all, or all that well; I'm normally not like this. Generally I'm a much happier person who doesn't go off the deep end like this. But because it was a medical issue, I hope you can understand.

Moral of the story: if God wants me to be bald, then so be it. Also, Google can be second worst enemy, right behind your own mind.

A Midsummer Night's Classic

I love baseball.

If you don't, stay with me for a little bit. Yes, this post is all about baseball, but I hope it won't be too boring for you if you're not a fan.

Tonight is the Major League Baseball All-Star Game, and every year it reminds me of why I love baseball. There are 162 regular season games, and any one of them can be great, just as any one of them can be boring or a dud. The All-Star Game is a one-shot where they players have a good time and show why they're the best of the best that year. While the playoffs and World Series may be more intense and have better quality games, there's just something that makes the All-Star Game enjoyable to watch. Maybe it's because I don't really care who wins all that much, or maybe it's because I know there is still a lot of baseball left to be played. Whatever it is, I really like it.

Many people don't like baseball, and wonder how you can enjoy a game that, in comparison to basketball, soccer, hockey, football, etc., is significantly slower. I like to think of it this way...

In basketball, there are 4 other people moving at the same time. Setting picks and positioning themselves to get open to either take the shot or pass it to you so you can take it. Similar with hockey and soccer. In football the quarterback relies on the blockers and receivers to make their plays so they can get the first down or a touchdown. However in baseball, it's the pitcher versus the batter. One on one. Yes, there are 8 other fielders and potentially men on base. But for that brief moment before every pitch, it's just the pitcher staring down the batter; and the batter waiting patiently for the next offering. Maybe that's why kids like baseball. Kids are inherently selfish, and a sport that offers them the opportunity to be the one star has to be appealing.

Living in North Carolina all my life, we've never had a professional baseball team. Growing up in the 90's it was fashionable to be a Braves fan, but I never really latched on to them. My affiliation for a team always went with little league. The City of Rocky Mount named their teams after pro teams, and when I played for those teams I always imagined myself playing in the big leagues, with people watching my every move. I was a Pirates fan, a Reds fan, and an Athletics fan...never really knowing anything about the teams that carried the same name as my little league teams. I played for three years under a team named after the Expos, and I became a huge fan. I had hats and t-shirts, and always played as them on my baseball video games. The problem there is that they were based out of Montreal, so going to see them play was never going to happen (even when I was in Montreal for a while, sadly the team had moved to DC). I decided that I needed to find another team to pull for.

One Saturday I was over at a friend's house and when we came in from playing outside the TV happened to be on CBS Saturday Baseball (yeah, a long time ago), and the Twins were hosting the Orioles. I kept hearing these guys talk about this one player and some kind of record streak he was chasing. That was Cal Ripken, Jr. I went through my baseball cards (of which I had a ton..) and learned more about him. I watched him play and liked how he handled himself. He wasn't flashy or cocky. He just went out there and played the game. I started to follow the Orioles and have been a fan ever since.

They say that baseball is America's national past time. I believe that to be true, but I think it extends beyond that. Baseball builds relationships, mostly between fathers and sons. Look at last night's Home Run Derby. Robinson Cano asked his father to pitch to him in the contest. Before the last and winning home run, his father looked at him and said "uno mas," to which Robisnon replied "uno mas. I love you dad." After it was over they embraced on the mound, with his father grinning from ear to ear.

I have great memories of playing catch with my dad in the back yard at home, or in the field at my grandmother's house. I remember going out to the fields on Saturdays so he could help me finally judge and catch pop flys. It's just something that is taught from generation to generation. This weekend some friends of mine and I are taking a trip up to Baltimore to watch two games against the Indians, and dad is going with us. I'm beyond excited about it.

Times change. Things change. People change. Places come and places go. Friends are made and friends are lost. Baseball doesn't change. No matter how old you get, as long as the game is around it's something you can talk about.

I think this is best summed up by a quote from the movie "City Slickers." A group of guys are debating about players, when the only woman in the group scoffs about it. They ask her if she doesn't like baseball, and she says that she just can't understand how guys can sit around and talk stats or ask who played what position in what year. They ask her what her friends talk about, and she says they talk about "real life;" relationships and so forth. Daniel Stern's character reflects for a moment and then says this:

"You're right, I suppose. I mean I guess it is childish. But when I was about eighteen, and my dad and I couldn't communicate about anything at all, we could still talk about baseball. That was real."

Now I can only partially relate to this as my dad and I have a great relationship, but we do always talk about baseball. It's timeless.

Before I go and stop boring you with my baseball ramblings, I have to give a shout out to my friend Rachel; an aspiring writer with a blog of her own that is a heck of a lot better written than mine, who gave my blog a plug on her, and who also wrecked face at our last poker night. Visit her blog: I Picked Up A Pen One Day...

Thanks, have a great night, and go out to the ballpark sometime. You might actually enjoy it.

The Physics of Quantum Fiction

One of my favorite topics to discuss/debate/wonder about is time travel. Most people know this due to my extreme fandom of the "Back to the Future" movies. I saw the first one when I was a kid and even though the opening scene with the amplifier scared me, I still loved the movie. The concept of time travel is about the most "sci-fi" that I really like. What makes it so interesting to me is that for a concept that's unproven and most likely not possible, there are so many theories and rules attached to it. Paradoxes are perhaps the biggest argument for why time travel cannot exist. The most popular example is the so-called 'Grandfather Paradox.' Let's say you traveled back in time and murdered your grandfather (morbid, I know). Well then he would have never married your grandmother, your mother or father would have never been born, you would not have been born, and thus never traveled back in time to kill your grandfather. So how can you exist to kill your grandfather if he's dead?

While I'm sure there's no perfect answer to this, it's a basic example of why people believe that time travel cannot exist. I like to think that if I ever were to travel back in time, I would need two reasons to. One of them would have to go unresolved, thus still giving me the desire to travel back in time and not creating a paradox. But that's enough of that, I'm far from a physicist and am only a fan of what might happen. It's just fun to think about to me.

Speaking of time travel, let's go back to the mid-90's, around 95/96/97 (not exactly sure which year). Summer time rolls around, and for school kids everywhere bedtimes and schedules are pretty much non-existant. For me, that meant a lot of late nights up with my brother playing games on the Sega Channel (if you don't know what that is, google it....it was way ahead of its time), or watching TV reruns with mom. USA always had a pretty decent late night lineup, and one of the shows that we watched was 'Quantum Leap.' It ran on NBC from '89-'93, and wasn't really liked by the network (see also: 'Scrubs') but loved by the fans. Basic premise is this...Dr. Sam Beckett (Scott Bakula) theorized that one could time travel within their own lifetime. He developed a project called Quantum Leap and prematurely stepped into the accelerator and vanished. (What's sad is that the name and that part of the premise tends to turn people off from the show, as it seems very heavily sci-fi.) Dr. Beckett wakes in a body that isn't his own, in a time that isn't his own. His purpose is to change the past, "putting right what once went wrong" before he can leap out to the next person. He has a guide from his own time, Al (Dean Stockwell), that only Sam can see and hear. The show did a great job of mixing drama, comedy, heart, and history.

Sam leaps into some situations that make us take a harsh look back on where we've been as a society and how far we still have to go. (When Sam leaps in he doesn't know who he is, where he is, or what he's doing. So when he leaps into an African American in 1950's Alabama and sits down at a lunch counter, this obviously causes a problem.) As a time travel fan and a fan of good story telling, this show doesn't really get any better. It's on Netflix instant viewing (mostly...some episodes are left off due to music rights or whatever reason), and I highly recommend watching a few episodes.

It's funny how some things stick with you and just the thought of them makes you sort of time travel in your mind. I watched an episode this evening, and when I was done I half expected to be sitting on the floor of our den, waiting for the next episode to come on, or going upstairs to join Josh in a game of Earthworm Jim or Monopoly or whatever was new on the Sega Channel, or have him explain the Pokemon card game to me yet again.

The saddest realization is when I actually do "leap back" and realize that those days are over, and that the feeling is just a fleeting memory, gone by much too fast, just like that time as well...

"...so do we pass the ghosts that haunt us later in our lives; they sit undramatically by the roadside like poor beggars, and we see them only from the corners of our eyes, if we see them at all. The idea that they have been waiting there for us rarely if ever crosses our minds. Yet they do wait, and when we have passed, they gather up their bundles of memory and fall in behind, treading in our footsteps and catching up, little by little." - Stephen King

That's all I have for now. So why haven't I leaped yet, Ziggy?

So I started a blog. Here's why...

Hello world!

I have decided that having an active Facebook profile and being involved with a group of friends just isn't enough to satisfy my vanity, so I started a blog. Actually, there are a few reasons that I wanted to start a blog. The main reason is that I really like putting random thoughts on a page, and constantly updating my Facebook status just doesn't seem to fit, and I really only use Twitter to follow people and retweet random crap, so this seems like a pretty good medium to use.

Give it another listen...

Another reason I wanted to start a blog came from an idea from a website that I don't think I could pull off or run efficiently. A while back (a few months or so ago) I was going through my iPod and finding some albums that I hadn't listened to in a while (I listen to a lot of music while at work, so old stuff seemed to be a good idea). I came across the album "Mad Season" by matchbox twenty. When it first came out in 2000, a friend of mine told me it wasn't all that good, and outside of the singles I wasn't really impressed with the album. However when I listened to it again, I found that my opinion of it had changed over the years and I really enjoyed it. That led me to think about other forms of media that could have aged better over time. I thought about gathering these 10+ year old items and "re-reviewing" them for today to see if they hold up, get better, or fizzle out. Problem is that to run a site like that takes several contributors, web space and hosting and a ton of time to put into it, and while I may revisit this someday (maybe in 10 years, ha), but for now I think I'll use the blog as my retro review site. Also, I like the phrase "mad season" because it always seems like the time you're in now is the most crazy....so you're always in a mad season.

Outside of that, I may ramble on about this or that...post some interesting song lyrics or a quote from a TV show, movie or book that I find interesting. It should always be different and have the reader guessing. I hope I can pull that off.

So let's recap. What will you find here? Random thoughts, quotes, old movie/game reviews, and hopefully something that will make you smile. And since I said I like to quote stuff, here's one from one of my favorite shows, "Scrubs:"

"...we all want to believe that what we do is very important, that people hang onto our every word, that they care what we think. The truth is you should consider yourself lucky if you even occasionally get to make someone, anyone, feel a little better. After that it's all about the people that you let into your life."

I don't think I could have said it any better.